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Zai Redwinters

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Life Update: June 2015 - August 2016 [Sep. 1st, 2016|04:18 am]
Zai Redwinters
[Emotion |melancholymelancholy]
[Tunes |Red Vox - Atom Bomb]

Now's as good a time as any to make an entry. It's been just over a year and a quarter since my last one.

The last year has been extremely... sad and frustrating, to say the least. Some good has happened, but... well, it hasn't really been enough.

There were some family health scares the last year. Thankfully, they've been ridden out and everyone is okay. I'm really grateful that my family is all still here and it worries me that I'll have to deal with the inevitable someday.
I thought I was prepared for it, but I couldn't even handle my friend's pet dying the other month. I don't know what will happen when someone in my family leaves us...

But anyway, we had our Christmas get together, just like every year. It was fun and relieving. I also went to my cousin's for Thanksgiving again. Hoping we get to do it for a third year this time too. We also had a dinner party for my Aunt's birthday a few months ago and are having another for my Uncle's sister in a little over a week.

As for relationships... not much to say there. I mentioned last year that my sorta-relationship of 3 years had come to an end. Since then, I've only really had a crush on one person, but it wasn't meant to be. She's really sweet, but I think her standards are a little too strict for my current way of life. I honestly wish I was more in line with them (since they were standards I wanted to reach anyway in life), but even so, she started seeing someone else, so whatever. We're still friends.

I've come to openly accept that I'm bisexual. But I'm a very picky person. I don't ever see myself forming a permanent relationship with a guy. They call it being "hetero-romantic", but I honestly have no clue what I am. I don't really care, but being flirty with everyone is fun as long as they're in on it too! When someone great comes along, then things can change.

I'm now over three years into unemployment and my search has led... nowhere. I've applied everywhere, tried everything, even asked others for help... but it just hasn't resulted in anything. My younger brother graduated college and pretty much just walked into a career in television production less than a week later thanks to his friend. I wish I had a friend who could get me in somewhere substantial...

I have long-mentioned on here that I wanted to go into voice acting, and I might still attempt to, but as I thought about it more, I realized that birds are a very important part of my life. I think, given the chance, I would like to go back to school and earn a Zoology degree to work in Ornithology someday. I wouldn't mind doing messy field work, if that's what it took to have a career with birds.

My laptop that I got at the end of 2010 ("Garterbelt", named after the Panty & Stocking character) suffered a major crash early August of last year. It managed to hold on until January, but from then until now, I haven't had a computer and have had to do everything from either my brother's computer or my iPhone. It was a bit messy, but someone extremely generous gave me a laptop they weren't using this past week. After fiddling with it for a while, it's finally up and running, to specs that are pretty good, actually. Windows 10 is nice once you get by all the annoyances.
I haven't given this computer a name yet, but given the trend of having G-names (the laptop before the last one was named "Gerako" by it's owner, Cammi) and my love of birds... I'll find something.

Speaking of birds, last October, I started a niche Twitter account called @RTyourbird, dedicated to posting submitted bird characters for other people to retweet. Within a week it had 200 followers and just this past month, it actually surpassed the amount of followers my personal Twitter account has! I've had it since 2009, so it's a pretty big accomplishment. I still run it daily and I don't intend to stop anytime soon.

So that's pretty much where I am now. I've gotten really into anime again this past year. I've always made time for Toonami on Saturdays since it came back in 2012, but I've also watched quite a few subbed shows. One Punch Man, JoJo's Bizarre Adventure (finally, amirite?), Gundam: Iron-Blooded Orphans and Unicorn, the Ace Attorney anime, Dragon Ball Super, and Macross Delta. Plus, I've been keeping up with the Digimon Adventure tri. movies. It's amazing that they went back to the story line from the first two seasons and continued it in a way that's appealing to the now-adults who grew up with the originals!

I haven't been able to play too many new games because of not having money, though I did play both of the Rhythm Heaven games I hadn't (Fever and Megamix), the third Zero Escape game which we all waited four years for (and, for the most part, not disappointed by), and everyone's favorite indie game of all time, Undertale. I don't know how I'll afford it, but I'm looking forward to Pokemon Sun and Moon in November.

Oh yeah, and Pokemon GO. Everyone's been playing that. I've pretty much hit all of my goals for the current iteration, but I'm still gonna play it on and off until the next major content update for it.

I've also been pretty invested in some game streams the last few years. I've mentioned Vinesauce a few entries ago and I'm still with the community there, slowly integrating more and more with it. They're great people! I've also watched the last four Games Done Quick events. They've really gained popularity the last couple years and it's amazing to watch these speedrunners destroy games for a good cause.

Now that I'm all set up with a new laptop that runs well, I was thinking about spending my spare time getting into game streaming and practicing voiceover stuff. I had actually wanted to do more of both last year, but the crash happened. As soon as a replacement controller comes in, I'm going to be streaming fairly regularly. I probably won't post about it here since no one's around, but if you're curious, stop by my Twitch page. There's links there to other sites I'm on too.

Anyway, I've rambled long enough. I'm sure I didn't cover everything of note that happened over the last 14 months, but I'm tired. Maybe I'll make another entry in another year. Or less. Or more. Who knows.
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(no subject) [Jun. 21st, 2015|02:13 am]
Zai Redwinters
Nothing much has happened over the last five months. Mostly video games and job applications. I had a phone interview and it went well but I didn't get the job because I wasn't qualified enough for the position.

That's really it. Wish there were more to update on.

Oh... my sorta-relationship ended. I'm not surprised, it really wasn't working out in a romantic regard for a while. I'm also very different from the me of high school and the me of college. It doesn't bother me too much. To be honest, the whole concept of a relationship has taken heavy blows with me and I don't know what to make of it anymore. I still want one and to be happy in the long run. But I no longer know what would constitute proper grounds to pursue one. I do like someone, but... it's not worth the emotional strain trying to make a relationship happen.

I hate waiting and I hate being alone, but I also have other problems to worry about. And perhaps I should worry about moving out first so I can find someone who lives where I want to live... or something.

I'll just deal with whatever happens, tbh. I've kinda stopped caring. I bore myself.

Since you stuck with me til the end of this entry, here's some recommendations for you:
-Watch Steven Universe. (All of it)
-Watch Kaiba. (It's short)
-Play Freedom Planet. (It's on Steam)
-Go see Mad Max: Fury Road.
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(no subject) [Jan. 17th, 2015|12:18 am]
Zai Redwinters
[Emotion |contemplativecontemplative]
[Tunes |Revo (Bravely Default) - Evil Flight]

I have not posted here in a long time, have I? Almost two and a half years now, actually.

I've been contemplating coming back here and, at the very least, making private entries again. I've pretty much all but migrated to Twitter and tumblr, just like everyone else because that was the hip and cool thing to do. The problem is, both sites are absolutely awful for documenting things. They're way more for socializing than being a journal, which is kinda why I questioned why this site was so heavily abandoned in the first place.

A lot has happened since the last entry I made, but I'll keep it brief.
Hurricane Sandy hit a week after the last entry I made. I was without power for over two weeks. It was an ordeal for sure, but we survived it well enough and things started changing from there on out.

By the end of the year, we finally switched to smartphones for various reasons. Ended up going with the iPhone. It's alright, I guess. We're actually due for an upgrade now, but we're not in a good spot to spend money.

The following February (2013), after dealing with a few snowstorms and such, I went to Texas for the first (and currently only) time. I went to a convention with a few acquaintances-now-friends. I had briefly mentioned it before in my previous entries, but I also went to a couple of conventions in 2012... one of which was with someone special to me. This time I went to this person's local convention instead of them coming here. It was an amazing experience that I wish I could've done again last year or this year, but... well... we'll get to that in a moment.

The next few months were fairly uneventful. I went to Nintendo World for the Animal Crossing: New Leaf release party. And as the months went by I gradually got myself more and more engrossed in Rooster Teeth stuff. I had been fairly familiar with them through Red Vs. Blue from back in my high school days, but it wasn't until early 2012 that I really started to watch their stuff regularly.

In August of 2013, I made probably the biggest choice of my life thusfar.
I finally quit working at Dunkin Donuts. After almost 8 years of employment, I just felt I couldn't work there any longer. The money was awful. The hours were awful. A good 50% of the customers were awful. The work was tiring. The place wasn't managed properly.
I was being forced to work alone most nights, which was a mixed bag because it was nice and quiet when I was alone, but there was also way more work than I was getting paid to do. Also, ever since mid-2012 or so, the tips steadily got worse and worse every day and I was lucky if I could pull in $5 a night while working alone (and half that when working with someone else). I had gone from making $40-50 in tips for four days of work a week to about $25-30 for SIX days of work.

I had this crazy thought that maybe somehow, if I took the plunge, I'd find my way into a dream career of voice acting or doing some job for entertainment companies I cared about (I've actually tried for Rooster Teeth about three times since then and haven't once gotten a response, not surprisingly).
Sadly, this thought was indeed crazy. It's been 18 months now and I still have yet to even find a temporary replacement job. I've been trying my hardest, but there's only so much I can do with my limited skills and experience.

My former problems have been replaced with a slew of new ones, mainly being short on money. I don't know what to do, but things will change sooner or later. It goes without saying, but the lack of money meant I wouldn't be taking any more trips.

I still managed to foot two conventions in that time, but both were local (they were both the same con I went to in mid-2012 in 2013 and 2014, respectively) and neither were spent with that special person I mentioned earlier... though I did get to witness two of my close friends get engaged. I was beside myself with emotion and cried pretty loudly, to the point where I kinda ruined the video I was shooting of it. Oops.

I hope someday I can feel that happy about myself, though.

The rest of 2013 and most of 2014 came and went. Games were still played (Fire Emblem, Pokemon, y'know, all the good ones that were on the 3DS), D&D happened a few times again, a couple of outings happened: went to NYC with Cammi and some newer friends, went to Jersey City for a meetup with people from a website community called "Vinesauce", went to cousins' place for Thanksgiving in 2014, etc.

I had a few job interviews but they went nowhere. Two of them were scams. One of them was a 3-hour commute each way. One of them just never got back to me.

And here we are. January 17th, 2015.

What will happen from here on out is anyone's guess. I'm in a bind still and aside from what I've said, the last two and a half years have essentially still carried that stagnation I mentioned in my previous entry. I hope things change soon.

Anyway, I hope it won't be another two and a half years between this post and the next. Like I said, I might privately blog about important things happening in my life for archival purposes. If there's still anyone out there reading this, then maybe I'll keep it visible.
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updoot [Oct. 21st, 2012|02:45 pm]
Zai Redwinters
[Tunes |Route 23 - Pokemon Black/White Version 2]

My life is still stagnant as fuck. Mostly. A couple things have changed for the better. If this were 4-8 years ago, I'd be making a much bigger deal out of it, but I honestly just feel so chill about it now. It's awesome. This is what being mature must feel like... for reals, y'all.

Every time I think about posting something I realize that it's just more video game stuff and no one's really around to read it anymore.

While I'm on the topic though, I'm legitimately upset that next month is the end of Nintendo Power magazine. I got a subscription back in 1997 on my 10th birthday and I thought I'd get it til the day I die honestly (or at least, give it to my kid). But alas, the internet has overtaken it much like it's overtaken most print media these days.
I wrote in a letter for the final issue. It's nothing special but I'm hoping it gets printed.

I guess above all, I'll just miss having the constant in my life. No matter what changed, I'd always be able to look in the mailbox once a month and get a day or two of enjoyment from reading the articles, regardless of whether or not it was new info.
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10 years [Aug. 30th, 2012|04:00 pm]
Zai Redwinters
[Emotion |jubilantjubilant, hopeful, and loved]
[Tunes |Persona 4 Arena Original Arranged Soundtrack - The Hero from Junes (Electro Mix)]


I've had a LiveJournal for 10 years as of today.
What bothers me about that is that I've had the same job for almost 7. It felt like such a long time between when I started working and when I got this thing but it was no time at all in retrospect.

Anyway, like I said before, everytime I look back on my entries here... I fucking barf. I went through so many damn phases and every single one of them is at least a partial embarrassment to who I am and who I try to be now. But that's part of growing up, y'know?

If it wasn't for LiveJournal, I would've never found out about Tegaki and Twitter and in turn wouldn't have found out about Tumblr (of course there ARE other ways I could've found them, that's just how it turned out). A lot of things in my life could've been very different if I hadn't joined this site from the friends I made, to the conventions I've gone to, to maybe even my major in college.

I, like everyone else now, grew up in the age of a blossoming digital community. And it's okay to make mistakes and mess up. Just make sure that when you get to a point where you've settled down a bit, you don't let everything you went through be in vain.

I am thankful for every person, every trip, every moment, and every mistake I have made in the last 10 years. To everyone who's ever been involved in my life in any way, be it positively, negatively, or both... thank you for helping make me who I am.
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(no subject) [Aug. 12th, 2012|11:55 pm]
Zai Redwinters
So in 18 days I'll have had LiveJournal for exactly 10 years.

When I finished high school and started college, I looked back on my earlier entries and thought "holy fuck I was a horrible misguided person".

Now I'm looking back at the entries I made in college and think the exact same thing.

That's perfectly fine because it means I have changed and got better, though! You may not always like who you were but that's the nice thing about the past. It's over and you can change.

More changes coming to my life soon. Unfortunately, that job I'm looking for is still out of my reach. But, in more ways than one, I'm going to mature a bit soon. Granted, I'll be on vacation, partying up with friends, but this weekend is going to be a very interesting learning experience.
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(no subject) [Jun. 18th, 2012|03:16 am]
Zai Redwinters
Last month I bought Snake Eater 3D and I'm just now really getting into it.

I'm still in that rut where I probably won't touch a game once I feel I've finished it enough (usually beating it once and getting most secrets) but I'm enjoying it so far. I've never played the MGS series before so it took some getting used to, but I like how it works. The stamina and injury systems are nice because they keep you alert to yourself but at the same time aren't so urgent that you need to be checking both every two seconds.

The Circle Pad Pro feels kinda awkward though. It does make the controls a bit better (having item/weapon switching and aim/fire all on shoulder buttons is very efficient), but at the same time I think if I had to play without it, I could manage just as well.

I bought myself a birthday gift. Doesn't come out til mid-July and even then it'll take another month to arrive (Chinese customs and all) but it'll be worth it.
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Writer's Block: ONTD Games Giveaway [Jan. 27th, 2012|11:58 pm]
Zai Redwinters

Which video game character would you like to have as your real-life BFF? One random response will win a $60 Amazon gift card! [Full contest rules here.] Don't forget to share your favorite gamer moments on at 3 p.m. PST for Free For All Friday (FFAF).

Phoenix Wright

Afterall, he takes his buddies' cases for free apparently, so I'd never have to worry about being on trial and having to pay attorney fees.
...as long as I'm actually innocent.
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Writer's Block: B.Y.O.B. Holidays [Dec. 12th, 2011|03:06 am]
Zai Redwinters

Which December holidays do you celebrate, and why? One random answer will win a $50 Amazon gift card. [Details here]

The one that involves a lot of drinking with little social interaction: New Year's Eve.
Because reasons.

Actually no, I celebrate Christmas with my family. I'm usually not a complete wreck that day.
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Writer's Block: Movember is Men’s Health Awareness Month [Nov. 1st, 2011|04:05 am]
Zai Redwinters

Who is the most important man in your life?

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Writer's Block: Get in my belly [Aug. 16th, 2011|04:58 am]
Zai Redwinters
[Emotion |busybusy]
[Tunes |Alterniabound - Horschestra STRONG Version]

What is your mother’s specialty dish? In other words, what food makes you salivate at the thought of it?

Oh man, almost anything my mom cooks is amazing. Lasagna at Christmas. Devilled eggs at Easter and Thanksgiving. Tacos. Macaroni with vodka sauce. Burgers (before we started neglecting the grill). Ham and pork loins. Prime rib, steak, London broil...


She doesn't cook much anymore because my bro and I will either make ourselves whatever or we'll go out to eat when our friends are around. She'll usually cook for holidays and on Sunday evenings now.

I'm really gonna miss her homecooking when I eventually leave. But, for some at least, I hope to learn her recipe well enough to make my own. She really doesn't deviate from the normal way of making things, but I guess it's just that homecooked taste I can't get enough of.

As I said before, she's gone right now til late next week. She made me tacos though and I still have enough to last me another 2 nights probably.

Ugh. I don't like how my weekend is already half over. I don't want to work Wednesday through Friday, three days in a row at that job is too much for me now.
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Writer's Block: True love waits [Aug. 13th, 2011|03:27 am]
Zai Redwinters

If you are dating someone who says they aren’t ready to commit, would you wait? How long?

It depends.
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Writer's Block: Late-night TV [Jul. 26th, 2011|03:12 am]
Zai Redwinters

We know you watch them (so do we)—what’s your favorite infomercial?

It's just so absurd.
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Writer's Block: Let freedom ring [Jul. 4th, 2011|03:12 am]
Zai Redwinters
[Tunes |Sonic Colors - Boss: Last Boss 2]

How do you celebrate Independence Day in your country?

For 3 of the last 5 years (including today), I worked.

One time I went to see a movie filled with robots and explosions.

Every other year I've either seen the fireworks or partied at my friend's neighbor's house.

In addition to all of that, America celebrates in general by airing 24 straight hours of The Twilight Zone on Sci-Fi/Syfy (except that one year when ECW was on July 4th). It's a ritual that also occurs on New Year's Day.
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Writer's Block: Born this way [Jun. 2nd, 2011|03:43 am]
Zai Redwinters
[Emotion |sillysilly]

If you were a cross-breed between two animals, what animals would they be, and why?

A bird and a frog.

I guess cuz they're my favorite animals.
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Writer's Block: Going boldly [May. 29th, 2011|03:10 am]
Zai Redwinters

If you could be any Star Trek character, who would you be, and why?

Spock, of course.

Cold. Mostly emotionless. Logical. All by nature.

It would solve every problem in my life at once. I'd have no need for love and companionship and I'd let a desire to survive properly overwrite emotional desires for fun, so I'd be able to find a job easier.

If only, right?
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Writer's Block: See the music [May. 7th, 2011|03:48 am]
Zai Redwinters

What's your favorite music video of all time?

Always relevant. And also completely rediculous looking.
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Writer's Block: Get up [Apr. 28th, 2011|05:10 am]
Zai Redwinters
[Emotion |hungryhungry]

If you had to eat the same breakfast everyday for a year (and it would be prepared and served to you), what would you choose?

IHOP's cheesecake filled pancakes with strawberry syrup.

I'd be dead within a week.
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Writer's Block: Eeny, meeny, miny, moe [Apr. 25th, 2011|03:42 am]
Zai Redwinters
[Tunes |Mega Man X Command Mission OST - Irregular Hunt 2]

If you had to give up swimming, skiing, hiking, or biking for the rest of your life, which would you choose, and why?

Skiing. Cuz I don't ski.

:3 It's not cheating, it's a valid choice.
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Writer's Block: Beep, Bop, Boop [Apr. 23rd, 2011|03:35 am]
Zai Redwinters
[Tunes |Super Robot Wars ZII - 感じてKnight]

What was the first video or computer game you ever played? Did you love it or hate it, and why?

...I don't remember.

No, seriously, I can't remember the first video game I ever played because I was so young when I started playing. I remember playing with my neighbor's Atari, but that wasn't the first game I played.

I guess I loved it, cuz otherwise I wouldn't have kept playing video games.

Speaking of video games, SRW ZII came today! I'm on chapter 4. Chose to head to Japan for two missions, and will switch to chasing Celestial Being after that until I have to either choose between Japan or Area 11, in which case I'll resume the Japan route. I'm not having too much trouble moving units and attacking, though I have to constantly look up spirit commands until I can remember who has what. One of my units also has some weird repair skill I didn't know about until I used it ._.
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